Thursday, 8 September 2016
Another ICC Discussion
This week the CEOs of the ten Test playing nations met in a special workshop in Dubai. Important issues about the future structure of the game, including a two tier test structure, were on the agenda. A subsequent statement advised the media that this option was no longer on the table but said that ‘there is an appetite from the ten full members for more context around all three formats of the game’.
Many struggled to understand what was meant by that statement. Veteran cricketers muttered that they hadn’t seen so much flannel since proper cricket trousers were abandoned for polyester pyjama pants.
Fantasy Bob is here to assist. Long suffering readers will know, from links such as this, that FB has unparalleled access to the deliberations of the organisation which guides world cricket so carefully. He is therefore able to bring to bemused fans the following transcript of this week's proceedings.
So this two tier test structure thingy – who’s in favour?
Right, that’s six of you. Who’s against?
..Two…three…OK four of you. A clear majority.
Yes, a clear majority. We reject two tier tests.
( A chant is heard in the background 'Reject, Reject')
But there were six for and four against.
That’s a majority in favour.
No it isn’t, India were one of the four.
Ah yes of course, then that’s a proper majority. So no to two tiers.
(The chant is heard again 'Reject, Reject')
But the associate nations want Test cricket.
Well, they can come and watch us play any time.
No they want to play Test cricket.
What’s the matter with them? Lots of us don’t.
(The chant is heard again 'Reject, Reject)
We need ……….
I know - why don’t we let the Associates play Test cricket………..
……….as much as they want……….
………..while we have all the ODIs and T20s………..
………………..and all the money….
Now you put it in that context,
(A new chant is heard 'More context, More context')
I’ve definitely an appetite.
(The chant resumes 'Lunch Lunch')