Tuesday 15 April 2014

Pandas back in the nets

It was early in the life of these Witterings that Fantasy Bob found himself considering the much heralded arrival of the Pandas at go ahead Edinburgh cricket club Carlton.

The Pandas were part of the go ahead club's development strategy and were expected to contribute regular additions to the junior section.  For reasons that have perplexed the club's emminent batting zoological and obstetric coaching team, the Pandas have failed to deliver.  A flurry of expectation that the pair would produce a little opening batsman for the 2013 season ended sadly as Tian Tian failed to follow through on a promising ramp shot.
Trunk curls
 were an essential part of the
 Pandas' pre season fitness training

This season the Pandas looked good in early outdoor nets but failed to get bat on ball.  Now Fantasy Bob learns that the club is losing patience with nature and will attempt to force the issue.

A spokesman for the club told the hordes of media panda specialists camped outside their Grange Loan HQ,

'There's something suspect with Yuang Guang's action, he just can't seem to get a length.  So to give Tian Tian a chance at scoring we're looking to a technological solution.  We recognise that the bowling machine may not have been used for the purposes of artificial insemmination before, but Fantasy Bob has had his screwdriver out and says that he is confident that it will do the business.'

While the waiting media observed Tian Tian being padded up ready to take her first delivery, they were not allowed to watch the process itself which remains a closely guarded secret.  However some reported that the noise coming from the screened off area made strong men weep.

No comments:

Post a Comment