Wednesday 8 August 2012

The difficulty of being FB


Fantasy Bob could have written his last match report for go ahead Edinburgh cricket club Carlton.

"I can't give any assurances that the next match report won't be my last," he said. "I'd like to carry on but there are obstacles that need to be worked out.'

While there has been speculation for some time that FB has found the demands of the Carlton schedule unsettling, particularly the expectation that he completes a match report for matches that are not played or are abandoned. But with vital match reports coming up, Carlton's management have stood firm and said that he cannot pick and choose what match reports to complete.   There are unconfirmed reports that disciplinary measures are being considered which would see FB deprived of empire biscuits for the rest of the season.

Views are divided in the cricket world on this issue. Many think that this is just another temperamental outburst by FB, drawing attention to himself at a time when the Carlton 4th XI should be working together for the vital last matches of the season. They consider that no one match reporter is bigger than the team.  They suggest that FB's endless variations on the joke of how little, or great, was the margin of his winning, or losing, the toss, or his speculation about Gustav Mahler's bowling action does nothing for team morale.   Others have noted his world class match report for Saturday's cancelled fixture confirmed his true class. Not only was the match cancelled, but FB was not in Edinburgh and he still completed a stunning match report - after a quiet paragraph, FB upped the jokes to words ratio and was totally dominant at the close.  To them his joke about the toss is critical to the team's performance.

Carlton's management were mystified by this latest controversy concerning their blogging superstar.  A spokesman for the club said, 'Who does he think he is?  Kevin Pietersen?' 

Who does he think he is?  Fantasy Bob
FB was unavailable for comment last night.

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