Tuesday, 27 December 2011

French Hens

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me 3 French Hens.

And what use would a cricketer make of 3 French Hens?  They can neither bat nor bowl and are pretty scratchy in the field.  At least they are not 3 French ducks.  In Fantasy Bob's experience there are too many ducks in cricket already.

One interpretation says the hens symbolise the three virtues - Faith Hope and Charity.  This does not really explain to the cricketer why hens of a non cricket playing nation are chosen as symbols.  It would have been far better to have nominated a cricket playing nation - although it would be absurd to choose Australia to represent virtue and that would narrow the choice down.  After reflection, FB thinks the best bet might be Sri Lankan hens, except it doesn't fit the tune.   Tricky stuff this, isn't it.

Nevertheless, all these virtues are essential features of FB's approach to cricket and are always at the front of his mind during selection meetings.
  • Faith - blind faith that his bowling action looks anything but ridiculously arthritic and about as athletic as a Greggs Steakbake; 
  • Hope - verging on desperation - that he might get off the mark; 
  • Charity - FB's presence on the field can generally be considered a very generous donation to the opposition.
3 Sri Lankan Hens.