Friday, 22 April 2011

Prayer on the night before FB's first match of the season

Oh Lord, who created all things in earth and heaven including cricket (and I suppose even the IPL)
Let me not swing across the line
Let me get my front foot to the pitch of the ball
And let me keep my hands soft that I may do your will
And caress it through the covers
And Lord if it is your will that I should snick one let the ball fall just short of the fielder
Oh Lord shouldst the ball smack against my pad like a sounding brass
Let that umpire judge that my pad is outside the line even if it is not really and not out is the true and just verdict
And Lord
Let not the stiffness of my back and slowness of my chasing and totally pathetic arm be the source of ridicule and contempt in the field particularly from the juniors
But let my bowling action be high and straight with just that bit of late swing that the batsman doesn't expect
And Lord if any catch shouldst come to me let it stick, even though that be a miracle, and let not the ball drop onto the grass as if it were a burning ember.
For thou art good. 
But most of all Lord - in amongst all the other things you have to sort out tomorrow - can you make sure it doesn't rain.


  1. Is there a Bach setting to this?

  2. FB understands that there was a setting attributed to Bach as part of his 'Cricket' Cantata (Leg Spin Bowling ist ein Greuel für den Herrn). Unfortunately the manuscript of that work was lost and is now believed to have been destroyed during the firestorms of the Second World War.

  3. Many thanks for that. After some research, the full title of this section of the Cantata has come to light - Linksdrehabsetzung ist ein Greuel fur den Herrn. It was first performed in Brandenburg (a green-topper if ever there was one) in 1732.

  4. FB - It rained! - God obviously wasn't listening?

  5. Opening Bat - indeed - FB must be a miserable sinner - but perhaps the Lord was listening only too closely which means that all the other things FB prayed against are obviously also going to happen.